U Should have said " it's ok baby most girls Sh*t when I do that.
He’s a liberal pot smoker and perfect for me. He invented a game where we have to smoke a joint every time you hear a Middle Eastern accent on NPR.
I just realized that all of my cardio comes from dancing on tables.
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
maybe you should do the old hyperventilate, take a shot of vodka, sniff someone's hair trick
Obviously you've never slept with someone who was deliverance level inbred.
When we were fucking he said and I quote "we're like a sex fajita"
Hahah what did you even say to him?!
That I was gonna inflate his vagina with a leaf blower?
Oh.
Some chick asked if she could eat me because I'm dressed as a taco. I introduced her to RJ. Best Wingman.
Sadly he is straight as an arrow that is designed by a robot computer from the future with lasers.
This saddens me. Mostly because I want to see the schematics on that robot.
I'm more worried that you thought licking a pole on Bourbon street would turn me on
currently buying a pregnancy test while braless so happy november to you too
I went out to have a smoke, and next thing I know, he's got me bent over a picnic table praying to deities I don't believe in. You should have been there.
look when god gives you a dick that good for his son's birthday you don't question it
Of course I fucked him. He was wearing a rainbow cock sock and cowboy boots.
Randomize
