69 |D_O
wtf does that mean??
it's a very specialized emoticon, means 'i heard you fucking some dude through my bedroom wall last night and so i listened intently"
Heard at work: Get out of my face before I cuntpunch you so hard your granddaughters have miscarriages. I love my job.
I'm moving there. Get me hired.
Just got a citation from campus security for an "accordion disturbance."
we just made rock paper scissors into a drinking game
This place doesnt have redbull or serve shots. Its like they are at war with fun.
..She then engaged in what she called an "interpretive pole dance"
Did the math... it's Magna Cum Laude whether I get a 4.0 or a 0.0 this semester. I'm blacking out now, wake me up when I have to walk across the stage,
Got some good news and bad news about the hayride this weekend.
The good news is its still on, the bad news is we don't have any hay. The best news, if you drink enough you won't give a fuck that its just a trailer.
I just found a plastic cup with panties inside of it. Let's play CSI.
After she saw a msg in his phone from me that listed the reasons why I love his cock, I don't think I can deny fucking her ex.
Hey I have your shoes. Do you remember shouting "Police brutality!" when the bouncer was kicking you out last night?
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
God fucking bless the man who invented the vibrator. Bless him and all his descendants. I think I saw the face of God tonight
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
You really need to not quote Anchorman while I'm giving you a serious blowjob.
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