Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
i feel like a lion cub that has been breast fed for years, and mom has left, and now i have to learn how to hunt on my own
I guess you can say it's a tradition... whoever brings home the ugliest guy has to do all the cleaning the next day
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
He was like a Bill Nye the science guy of sex....he was telling me things about my clitoris that I didn't even know
open bar reception. dayglow. pray for me
I doubt were getting our security deposit back... the toilet just fell off the wall
You were fucked up like a footballbat trying to eat gum off your shoe. And that wasn't even the nights lowest point.
I woke up to him peeing by our bedroom door. I yelled at him to go to the bathroom and he just kept peeing while he walked there. This is a new low.
What I thought was my travel sanitizer was actually my travel lube. Most awkward transit ride of all time!
I pulled you and a keg around in a wagon for like five hours and apparently everyone else remembers it but us.
Can I come over and get it in, take a nap in ur bed, grab some poptarts and then leave?
You haven't lost that air of class about you...
Who the fresh hell put 2 pillows a raincoat and a guitar on top of me to keep me warm last night
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