I'm not to broken up about it. Our relationship was worse than a coldplay song.
Fuck the gym. I just shaved m'cooch and my pants now fit looser.... Dont judge me.
I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
Well unless he sent his sperm via fedex, this baby isnt his
Today as a vday present for myself I am walking in between any couples I see on campus.
looking at that huge scar on my leg from when i got drunk at 9 AM and walked into a grill. so excited for football season to start again!
he just flipped me off the bed, said "deal with it", and came on me.
I think now I understand why people say my penis is pretty.
Lets just say...I plan on being a bigger shitshow than Miley Cyrus at the VMA'S
Make sure you plan your visit for October. That's ACL festival, it's like every Bro in the country converges on Austin. My vagina wants to go hunting.
Thank you for helping a fellow gay friend today. You are sublime and deserve free tickets to the Ellen show
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
He started planning our future mid-hookup. You tell me how my night was.
New strategy for telling if someone is drunk: will they attempt to drink a candle if you put a straw in it?
Our conversation went from you choking me to my quarter life crisis reeeaaalllll quick.
Randomize
