I have no morals, kinda like you have no standards
When you want to head down the cleveland on Sunday?
What time do the bars open? I dont want to remember how bad theyre gonna lose
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I'm doing laundry in pjs and heels, home alone with my margarita bucket.
New York to be Host to America’s Biggest Singles Event
She's the barista slut.
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I don't believe u have enough text space to describe the dimensions of his penis.
Note to self, stop going out with self absorbed bisexuals
TACOBELL COOL RANCH TACOS MARCH 7TH. I think realistically that will be more like valentines day for us. Bc nothing says romance like tacobell.
Kylie Jenner Wasn’t in the Kardashian X-Mas Cards & the Internet is Losing it
Birthday are for suffering. TAke some tylenol pm and day-drink tomorrow
Dude just the look on his face when she sat down next to him, threw one leg over his, and just said "so..." was fucking amazing
I don't know if dry shampoo will fix the decisions we made last night.
You don't know how small your school is until you know everyone in the ER on a Friday night.
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in