True but thats because hes a fetus.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
What do you call a girl with PMS and GPS?
A crazy bitch that WILL find your ass!
Yeah, but I'm out of licorice and there's no way anywhere near here will rent us all mopeds on a Tuesday night.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he fingered my asshole thinking it was my vag...I couldn't bring myself to tell him, mostly from shame for me and pity for him
I just got a 45 minute blow job...she literally sucked the single life outta me.
u sound so gay right now
I got a bikini wax for the first time today and I think I now understand feminism.
I hurt. I blacked out in a onesie. Reevaluation needs to happen.
Not only is it unacceptable to be bar hopping alone at 5 o'clock. It is definitely unacceptable to do so with a lobster
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He ate me out on the balcony. My asian neighbors cats are judging me...ALL 3 OF THEM!!
After they flagged you, you hid in a bathroom stall and text me to bring you more shots. That kind of drunk.
When I woke up everyone at the party was in their underwear. Only you guys were playing strip pong.
Yes, we all have the power to convince a large amount of people to take their clothes off
I wouldn't say I LOVE Pacman. I mean, sure, I'd battle against you in an epic Pacman struggle for blow jobs and glory. But I mean, who wouldn't?
He called my vagina "the man cave", and I found it charming
Guy in my class today said, "I'm pretty sure you think about beer 95% of the time."
Randomize