oh God, I have a dick of a middle schooler
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
my mom used to put diet coke in my bottle. i can pretty much handle anything.
Just erased 'masturbate' from my mental To-Do list because I've got too much stuff to do. I hate adulthood
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
he tried to convince me he was a seal.. sound effects included. and then asked me to 'be his lady seal'.
I dont even care how hung over I am, and how shitty this bus ride will be. That was the best sex of my life and it's a beautiful morning.
he got kicked out of the bar for falling asleep on the mechanical bull.. then freaked on us cause we wouldnt go to the strip club with him
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
22 is way too old to still be having "thank god I think I'm getting my period" days
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Dude... I had a dream that I was getting high for the first time. I got to experience my weedginity again. It was glorious.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
BITCH I AM EXPERIENCING THE FEMININE MYSTERY SHUT UP AND GIVE ME DRUGS
Wanna go get tea? Warning: I will be high in an hour.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
There's a point in life when you've got to take dick like a big girl.
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