and the officer said have you been drinking
and i said NOO SIR.
and he said, I am a woman.
i told him i was sober and he walked away immediately.
hot pretzels for dinner, snacks, and now breakfast...oh to be a poor college student...everyday is like a carnival.
So you used a whole package of smoked meat last night. Didn't eat it, just took it out and put it all over the fridge.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I cannot even. Taco bell reception. Beers. New friends from Georgia.
Well, I looked over and you and him were each making out with a fireman. And then you switched. And you probably spent an hour like that.
How do you feel about fucking me quick and then me leaving to go do arts and crafts?
I ripped the door frame off last night too. Just remembered.
Don't patronize me, I thought of that on peyote, so it was basically like a message from God.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It was incredible. For as long as I live, I will gladly drop whatever I'm doing and spend a night with her face between my legs ANY time she asks.
I am decidedly straight, but I'll write it into my wedding vows if I have to.
I know I say this every year but 2015 will be the year I finally have sex with David's sister
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
its the 14th virginity that counts the most anayways
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
You are hungover. Your arguments are irrational an incoherent. We only played twice. Have some Gatorade and take a knee.
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