Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
lets start a swedish sibling band together
Im drinking a large pickle jar full of Emergency, water and left over pickle juice and I dont care.
Its your turn to fuck our RA next time she threatens us with an underage.
well I already know I'm going to hell, at this point it's really go big or go home
Dear god how many nuts did u bust in me my vagina feels like a bowl of jello.
At what point do you think my baptist preacher of a father will clue in that my brother "bringing a foreign exchange student" for thanksgiving means "bringing his european boyfriend and they'll probably fuck every night" for thanksgiving?
That sounds worse than that time you thought out an entire story of how big bird would kill you
I DONT WANT YOUR DICK. I WANT BRUNCH.
Now all I have unanswered questions and a fucked up finger
We got stoned and took selfies with the most perfect lawn
I'm not a morning person, and, trust me, no matter how good your cock may be, it will not turn me into one.
I think I'm gunna glue a sign to my head that says "WAKE ME UP BEFORE 7!" And go to sleep and hope a kind passer by wakes me up for my exam .
Best neighbors ever! They found the guy ive been wanting as a booty call and got me invited to the party the guy was at and gave me alcohol so i could be tipsy when met him. im never moving.
It was platonic naked porno viewing, I swear.
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