Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
Do you remember peeing on the wall and then yelling at us to stop looking at your dick?
I'm drinking away my Christmas cash. People are going to get bar receipts as presents.
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Rooting for you and your team in the Beer Olympics this afternoon...! Love you, Mom
so thats a no on the drunken crutches race 2moro
Yes, but if I hadn't gotten here early, I never would have seen the butch lesbian midget waddling down stairs from the bar. Worth every minute of drinking alone.
Wanna tell me why vodka seeped out of the memory foam when I climbed into my bed?
the fact that we had sex in the dining hall makes it seem so much more like home.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When are you going to accept the fact he is gay?
Come on... He's just practicing.
Ok. That's acceptable.
Fucking that physical therapist guy was the best decision I ever made.
My inner pteradactyl is also confused.
I was totally pumped and so was my beard
Turns out he's actually a she. Might keep dating her just to see Mom's reaction.
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
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