I want to take you away to a place of dolphin rides and hot stone massages.
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
this text is just filler to avoid a lull in the conversation
ahh summer, the season during which the prefix for every verb is "get drunk and"
She kept screaming "best case scenario"
just an fyi, false alarm on the whole ghonnorea thing. you're safe.
I'm at the bar alone. Is this how you feel?
BEST FEELING EVER: Standing in a hot fucking shower, while super baked, while eating a cookie.
You eat cookies in the shower?
Also I just learned you, Samantha, and I three-way made out at my Halloween party. News to me.
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
is it wrong to hook up with someone at a memorial drum circle
Whenever someone tells me they've never met a bisexual, I feel like a majestic fucking unicorn.
He told me that if he broke my bed my bed durring sex he would take me to ikea, but only on Monday because it's all you can eat meatballs. I think I'm in love.
I woke up next to my bosses toilet.i wish you had just left me in the neighbors yard.
Also I know now I was meant to be a comedian. Had both arresting officers laughing.
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