No. I was horrified and confused as to why you thought scrambled eggs and cottage cheese was a good mix
also, did you notice that when he quoted your email he used MLA format?
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
After 2 hrs of driving around looking for him, we just found him sleeping in the bed of my truck with the cover closed, cuddling with the spare tire.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
Advice for you. Never grate cheese on your counter then not cleanup the scraps, then have your bf over and endup having sex on the counter. Theres literally cheese melted in and around my ass.
You know Im horny if Im walking around in my lingerie and sex robe. It's my field of dreams mentality. If I wear it, he will come.
Trying to roll joints on a seadoo in the middle of a lake on a windy night. -Juststonerthings
I am the worst person to have nipple rings I'm hanging ornaments off of then and sending everyone a tits the season to be jolly
Not only do I have a well-defined bite mark on my arm, but I also have a perfectly clear bruise of a handprint wrapped around my arm like a tribal tattoo. Thoughts on how that happened?
Dude, I wish I could live my entire life blacked out.
He can be a kind, caring soul but also give in to the temptation of eating unicorn ass.
I just found out through a drunken phone call that my parents thought I'd grow up to be a porn star. It's kind of scary how accurate they were at how skilled I'd be at sex.
You know its awkward when your mom walks in on you and your boyfriend yelling surprise....I was scared into an orgasm
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