Please explain to me what this has to do with my fantasy to fuck larry king?
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
we need 14,000 post its to execute this plan
As a matter of principle, I waited until noon to start the drinking binge.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
I just woke up in his house on his bathroom floor with an IV in my arm.
what customs doesn't know wont hurt them
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
You played a drinking game to fat people crying. It's a long climb to the moral high ground, why bother?
People were drinking out of 26ers with straws, and somewhere someone yelled "fill me with dicks!" I'm home.
Dude. Yeah. This is a game changer. I feel dirty and possibly pregnant and it hasn't happened yet.
Mostly because I hate my job and a have a photogenic penis.
so today, i decided to say "fuck it" to mental stability, take a klonopin and wear a blanket toga. New Girl is on Netflix, nothing could go wrong.
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Basically, I am an endless fountain of unconvential sexual experiences and knowledge.
Randomize
