butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
I just threw up and a whole piece of spaghetti came out of my nose. I don't even remember eating spaghetti.
he calls his bong barack obonga, commander in kief. i found where i belong.
Ryan just walked out of his frat house with a case of beer, a 6 dollar bottle of vodka, and a pillow. He's good to go.
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she's laying in my bed with an ice pack on her vagina. how do you think it went?
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
WHAT THE FUCK. SUCH A BAD IDEA. YOU'RE NO LONGER IN CHARGE OF NOSE SUBSTANCES.
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
If you're not going to call the girls I bring around by name, at least don't call them by number. It's been cockblocking since girl #47. Dick.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I can't tell if my bong is gender-neutral or not
Some guy just walked past the bus stop in a lab coat and with a samurai sword and case...
He started humming a moment like this when I was taking off his pants.
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Grandma had me open the boxes that were delivered today. She got a sex swing, I've settled on "You go girl" as my official reaction.
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