Who haven't you slept with?
No one comes to mind.
i don't have parental supervision. i'm gonna start accepting candy from strangers now.
dude, mark had the least successful cab ride in history last night. took a cab to the bars, stopped at every atm in the city, none worked, then had to come back to the party to beg for 20 to pay the taxi that officially took him nowhere.
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
yo everyone went to the hospital last night
I am wrecking havoc on the skinny girls by going home with the big one. She is taking me to see her dog now.
Strike three, the fat brides maid they call shit puker also has herpes.
I asked him to make me two boxes of macaroni and cheese. That's like eight servings. How did I think that was an okay amount.
You know you had a good time when you get the wheelchair treatment in Mexico back to your cruise.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
I want to ride his face like a jet ski
Comedy Central is in dire need of more sitable faces late at night - Trevor Noah has a baby face - there are federal rules against those types of sexual fantasies
you ripped my door off of the hinges, kicked it in half and then proceeded to throw it down the stairs because i wouldn't make you a cheese burger
Dude... this pee is not alleged
YOU SAT ON MY LAP!
Wuddup pee lap
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