Just saw a denim jacket with the phrase christian cowboy...ridin with the lord under a picture of a cowboy in a sunset. I'm def in mississippi.
Just so you know I would totally fuck you. Does that count as a feeling?
Woke up with the note 'going outside. Ignore bloody spoon. Be back soon' taped to my forehead. Know anything about it?
He rubs his penis on back when he think I'm sleeping
In all fairness I didnt see your dick because it was already in her
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
I stole a fireplace last night.
I might not remember all of last night but I clearly remember the part where I humped the mailbox.
my math prof is telling us what to do in a gun fight. i dont want to live in oakland anymore.
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
We could get her a gift basket of Xanax l
Just broke my no shot rule again.. Made out with a stranger. That's 0 for 3 this month for the record
Woke up eating a pickle on the bathroom floor this morning in some random guys sweat pants.
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
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