There's a show on bravo about fat people dancing. FAT PEOPLE. DANCING.
This is god's gift to the unemployed.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I mean, it really isn't YOUR car until you have sex in it.
the last girl i hooked up with and the last guy i hooked up with are hooking up right now. this is where bisexuality becomes a problem.
just to let you know, its not cheating if i cant feel my hands.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
I just did a sobriety test in a tutu.
That white girl was surprised to see orange pubes around my black cock. Happy Halloween!
perfect irony that i'm celebrating international women's day with a yeast infection
being a senior sucks, I just started embracing my inner slutty college girl, and it's almost time to put her away...for like, ever. and i really like her.
I seriously want to say to him "Do you know how many blow jobs you could have gotten this summer?"
Wednesday is good, I needed the head count for the orgy, caroling can happen with as few as 2 people. There will be a pinata.
For the caroling or the orgy?
Well, let's just say, I got that eye patch like we were joking about
Oh yeah, you are a real peach except for shitting uncontrollably and bleeding out of your face.
It’s just a penis. It’s like every other penis except it’s not the one you’re married to. Ride it or don’t ride it, but don’t agonize about it
Your not going to hell because you need some strange and the neighbor noticed you look damn good in a bikini
Randomize
