I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
As my groomsman, I expect you to learn the Thriller dance with me before next September.
I'm sorry but when I'm riding in the trunk on the way to mcdonalds at 6 am I just don't want to listen to reba macintire
its not that she doesnt like having sex with you, your balls just smell worst then your ass.
We just saw him running from campus police a few minutes ago. So no, I don't think he's still passed out on the quad.
She just came to my house, with puke in her hair, to wake up my dad and scream "happy fathers day you DILF!" at the top of her lungs
There's a 35% chance I'm still residually drunk from last night.
And you say you're not good with numbers...
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
I world jack off literally anyone now that I'm not related to.
She told me she's dating him because his apartment is a block from Taco Bell. I don't know how she's not fat.
My general physician told me i have the emotional capacity of a 2 year old, While he refilled my xanax prescription. That's service!
Well, I crapped my pants in front of her entire family, was laughed out of their house, and I had to walk home with shit stained pants. So, yeah, it went really well.
That's actually very serious....I really do think of you whenever is see pizza
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
Randomize
