your butthole totally puckers for the ginge
The funny thing is... I'm about to go to the store to buy WD-40 and condoms... That's it.
And before you ask they are unrelated purchases.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
Because its an amazing idea and you're the only one I can think of that will allow a pirate threesome
he seriously made his penis a facebook.
Meanwhile I am sitting on the couch with a 32 ounce rum and coke trying to decide if I'm too drunk to go get french fries.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
I puked on myself in front of a customer. all. over. myself. thanks Saturday nights
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I sobered up and saw I was with the fat one and you had left laughing with the hot one. You're a terrible wingman, but an excellent manipulator
I am coping with the snow storm with beer and shots of jack. If I were outside in shorts I might be able to pass as a Canadian.
she said she wouldn't go home with me until she looked up my name in her sex offender app. do i really give off that vibe?
Yeah. It's not just the beard either.
Giiiirl. Just had a BM that almost killed me.
It's Christmas, you should know what a virgin is.
Woohoo! Instead of a pregnancy test you can buy me a burrito
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