I'm fascinated by her cleavage. She has deep cleavage, but no obvious boobage to speak of. Check it out.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
batman tramp stamp. Dibs.
We've gotten 3 pitchers already by trading for CUPCAKES
He was so good, that I'm pretty sure he fucked his religion into me. P.S. I'm Jewish now.
Just found a condom on my floor from last weekend. 2/2. The scavenger hunt is over.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
Two months ago an unknown man was in my bed and now he is my boyfriend and he has 1.6 million in the bank and he buys me things because I only have $4.35 in my bank account
It could happen to you too!
That's the 2nd med student that has had his tongue in my butthole, what gives.
I was so close to going to get my nipples pierced with my mom today
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
Lo siento on account of my penis...
Things that have happened since you moved: Lemmy, Bowie, Snape, Prince, civility, democracy, Carrie Fisher, all dead. Record flooding down here. Twice. This is clearly your fault.
I HAVE A TEST I'M SORRY YOUR UN SUCKED DICK ISN'T MY FIRST CONCERN
Autocorrect changes "sex" to "sec". I have been so long without it my phone thinks I made a mistake.
Randomize
