I've been watching too much manswers. Cuz i know scissoring doesn't work on a motorcycle.
To make up for the snow days we missed he's making us write a paper on alcoholism. It's like he knows.
how are pickles made is in the google history again... why do you always wonder that, and forget the answer?
I cannot believe I said bareback movement...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So last night I kicked a beer can off of a frat guys head and it nailed one of my sisters in the face. Think i'll be brought up on standards?
My concierge just asked me to his place for dinner while I was signing for a delivery. The delivery was a box of vibrators. Let's discuss.
The sad part is that if I don't get a random pic of your balls or ass or both every month, I start to worry that we're not friends anymore
Your brother slept on my deck. There was a key under the mat. Relapse party success.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
And then the templeton police were like "oh I remember her, yeah the blue haired girl that we picked up cause she was passed out drunk on the side of the road"
Wow! It's so great to hear from you! We all thought you perished in Winepocalypse 2012, man.
After walking ten blocks barefoot in Boston I've concluded drunk me needs to make better decisions.
he’s basically the devil with a fuck boy hair cut and chlamydia
So today was the first day i've been sober since Wednesday according to my roommate!
Thanks for supporting me through Robs retirement. I'm still in shock, but your dick helped.
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