dude I went to cubs game with my mustache, aviators, and a hooded sweatshirt. Do you think it was irony or fate that there were four 17 year old girls in front of us?
Different chick, same blowjob, same parking lot.
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
We were naked in his bed when he asked me "what should we do?"
and hes going back to rehab like me, so we have common interests
How does me getting a new dildo make you crave olive garden
You see.... Im at the point in my life where pissing in a toilet is a luxury for me
You made me drive your car so you could give the dude from the parking lot a BJ in the back seat. Classy.
You fucked two dudes in the same night and still went home to your cats. How does that happen?
My purpose is to unleash drunk self on strangers, i believe as some terrifying icebreaker, otherwise i too would offer my driving services.
Shia LaBeouf arrested in austin for public intoxication. JUST DO IT
No it's a real cult, with original ideas and shit like that
Gez, you make a couple noises and all of the sudden your the loud girl.
He called out my ex's name during sex.
Alex is a pretty common unisex name.
It was the same Alex. I asked.
they are cutting me off...little do they know I am making a 75 yr old man i named Herbert buy me drinks now...no shame at 11 am...
Randomize
