Pussy?
how
Wat do u mean how?
I had a bacon mcgriddle for the first time today. It was like eating a baby angel.
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
you are my patron saint of "too drunk for 9am". i just keep asking myself what would alyssa do as i try to regain motor function
Charles Darwin would shit his pants if he saw that we managed to survive that weekend.
First memory of my senior year: Going into registration still drunk from last night.
First roommate to find me and dance with me will live. Battle Royale.
Lmfao I'm not trying to have a pissing contest over acid with my mom.....
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
So I fucked him. Then I MC Hammer'd to the bathroom, where I did the robot in celebration of my accomplishment. And then I spent 10 mins fixing my toilet. But YOLO.
ARTHUR IS ON FUCKING NETFLIX THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
They ran out of toilet paper so I used the rug to wipe my vagina
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
Randomize
