STUCK IN CAPS. WANA GET AFTER IT TOMORROW?
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
I'm going to replace you with a friend who will be happy when I find a huge penis
We welcome drunken adversity.
With open legs.
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
She just gave me a free latte.
Correction. She just have you a frothy, creamy path to that vagina.
we got kicked out of McDonald's because you kept screaming THAT SHIT CRAY at the woman in front of us because she ordered a fish filet.
...that shit cray.
We just weren't working out together, on a completely unrelated note some guy that i talked to on his grinder account said i could crash at his place
I envy your ninja level of don't give a fuck
Beer, water, beer, water, beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer beer so much beer
This lady gave me four cups to go along with my gallon of daiquiri. Silly girl, all I need is a straw.
Went kayaking. drunk. DID NOT FALL IN. Mission succesful.
Though I don't usually want to turn down ladies who want to liquify my clothing with their eyes, I made an exception.
my favorite part of this morning was sitting at the gynecologist smelling like cigarettes and wearing yesterday's clothes.
you can see where the duct tape was on my nipple
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
Randomize
