i am sorry to ask, but i need y0ur honest opinion . when i turn sideways to someone, does my nose stick out like a beak ?
i had a dream that i had so much marijuana that i didn't know what to do with it. i woke up and cried.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
toilet paper cling ons are not as adorable as the little red cub makes them look on the charmin commercials.
We decided I could make bicurious-jitos or ho-meh-jitos or heteroflexible-jitos. But not homojitos.
I wish I could go back in time 3 years and tell my freshman self how easy it is to hook up with freshmen
I have a date tonight... Like a real date... Not the kind where you just go over to his house and have sex and then never speak again.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
I find it ironic...the gays are dying to get married & I just want a fucking divorce
I shaved my legs and got a bikini wax, I don't care what I take home as long as it has a penis
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Well you know I have tits so that's half the battle
I can't remember the last time I saw a penis in person that I didn't see a million times on text first
WHY THE FUCK DID I HAVE TO FALL IN LOVE WITH A CONVICT
Randomize
