Packing for the trip... do they take Visa in South Dakota?
her parents were awake and in the next room. i think i deserve a big fucking medal for that orgasm.
I woke up with dick mouth, a raw vagina, an empty bottle of vodka and the best man next to me. I also found my thong by the pool. Best.Wedding.Ever.
you can think of my virginity as your little souveneir from our relationship.
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Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
It's 10AM, she's drunk blaring veggie tales and I have a paper to write you've got to be fucking kidding me
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
So it took me 20 minutes to figure out that this is the wrong blind date. I'm going to go with it, he's cute and at least it's free beer.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
FONT CPME TO THE TRUK. I REPATE SONT COME TO THE TRUCK WERE GETTON FRAEKY
sorry to break it to you, but he's definitely fucking that other girl now...
I wish I still at least had the bruises on my ass to remember him by.
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
Swimming turned traumatic when grampas shorts slipped off..
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
IT WAS A FUCKING ELEPHANT I SWESR!!!!!
Nathan, I haven't spoken to you in 12 years and it's 6am. Kindly fuck off.
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