We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
I'm considering failing out of my last semester of college just so I can keep fucking him.
Just make sure my intervention has a theme...
I just made an agreement with this milf to shoot her daughters wedding in exchange for blow jobs. Going pro was the best choice I ever made.
You should have heard my farts after he left. I swear one of them was a demonic voice saying, "It's coming for you, Nicole. It's coming,".
You came down the stairs dressed as winnie the pooh and kicking cups off the table and out of people's hands
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
Idk what y'all are doing but I just want you to know I'm home and if I hear him say "slap it" one more time I'm moving out
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
wouldn't be a true Fourth of July without dropping acid at 9pm on a Monday
FREEDOM
I'm just gonna back away slowly and come back when there's less weird crap.
I heard a crunch while giving him head. I looked up and he was eating Cheese Itz. So we made a deal that he'd take a hand job so I could eat them too.
You cuddled up under the blanket because you said it smelled like Santa and vodka.
It's officially "let him eat me out in a sundress with no panties" season. Needless to say the first date was a success.
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