Watching NYC prep. Doing a shot everytime one of these d-bags flips his hair. I give it 10 minutes before alcohol poisoning set in.
I literally just watched a girl motorboat herself
i had a headache and asked the kid next to me for aspirin. he gave me esctacy instead. gotta love college.
Pretty sure that Albanian broad gave me something last night. Now we play the waiting game.
they're both coked to the gills having a shouting match about the powers and abilities of godzilla. and using the wikipedia entry on the topic to support their respective arguments.
Bc when the owner of your local gay bar and a drag king ask you to take them to a rival gay bar 2hrs away at 4 in the morning YOU GO.
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I don't like getting sloppy drunk but I don't like getting just half drunk either, I'm way too responsible if my blood alcohol level is below 0.2
I think I'm a wingman for every guy who bangs a girl I scarred in highschool.
We were licking ciroc off the poker table
Can you please help mom and dad? Theyre trying to figure out Skype, and its like 2 cavemen finding fire.
Wow just discovered I can communicate my favorite sex positions using only emojis god bless this age of technology
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
You know it’s going to be a rough day when you scream “Get fucked” at your alarm clock
5 am booty call not ok. The fact I actually went over definitely not ok. My vag needs to learn some control.
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