So you refered to him as "monster dick"...not so much
Only you could turn Mozart into a stripper song.
I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Judging that there's a photo of me getting head while sitting on a graveyard tombstone.....not good.
Its official. Girls from Indiana do not give rim jobs.
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
No, it wasn't really a sexy 'I'm going to go masturbate.' It was an 'I'm going to go masturbate' that implied I was going to drink a tall boy of Mikes and cry while I looked at lesbian porn.
You know, I think when I have a lot of free time, thats when I pick up odd lovers. Maybe keeping busy is key to not using my vagina
I have an interview tomorrow and listed you as a reference. If they call you, please don't tell them about the time I smuggled a Chalupa out of Taco Bell in my underwear.
You can't break up with me. I brought you to see Beyoncé.
He's such a neat freak that he started making the bed while I was still laying on it naked. He succeed in case you were wondering.
ok first of all what the fuck
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
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