LETS GO REDSKINS!
Quit drinking and watching your DVR, it's wednesday.
He has 250 profile pictures. Of course he was a douchebag
she said, and i quote, "i want to black out with my rack out"
keep an eye on me. i'm afraid that after a few more drinks i'll ask to borrow his wheelchair.
I basically get to watch her life fall apart via tumblr updates
Seriously this night has "go home now before you cry, puke or scream on someone" written all over it.
First Thanksgiving as a grown up: My step dad had to take my brother (who still smells like booze) and I both to our cars this morning, apparently we were at the same bars (same stamps), & I think I broke my elbow. Im thankful to be alive & not incarcerated.
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
I still have beer shits from last weekend. Dying from dysentary is a real threat at this point.
Let's go dancing. I wanna sprain an ankle. And a labia. My labia or yours. I'm not picky.
Can we just talk about how I wrote out all the stuff I had to do this week and for Thursday it says "drink and cry"? ...I don't remember putting that but it sounds like something I would do
Booty calls should never involve the cops.
listen I need taco bell and an orgasm within the next hour. I'll leave the order in which you provide those things up to you
I'm not winning any crowns in the Miss Emotionally Stable pageant either...
Randomize
