If Ritalin and Plan B had an illegitimate child it would smell like me.
NEVER shave your cleavage hair.
Grandma was not a fan of the beer-can ornaments. Not "traditional".
She gave him HEAD floating down the river in a tube as big a a tire. I just don't know how to compete with that sort of level of slut.
He puked at the bar then immediately procceded to slip in it, they loaded him up into a wheelchair, then the staff and myself walked him outside, all the while never having to pay for our tab. SO using this strategy again
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
You left your underwear here. I'm hanging it on my door
ex-cheerleader. ex-gymnast. ex-dancer. i dont even know who to go for tonight
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Just watched my first Christmas porn of the year. Def have the spirit now
I mean I could but due to my age and being a mother and all I feel it's poor judgment to give fellatio in a public establishment.
I'm not sure why he thinks weird that I masturbate AND look at pinterest at the same time.
I was masterbating to some porn on my phone and my mom decides to text me "are you okay?" I mean i was doing great until you cock blocked me mom..
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
Is 6 weeks really a benchmark now?
Ask me in 6 more weeks, when they're in a bisexual polycule.
Randomize
