my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
mmmm my 21st bday fucking sucks all my best friends are pregnant...selfish assholes. they just couldnt wait til after my bday.
I feel like I should put "don't judge me" in the special instructions for the pizza guy.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Where'd you guys get the alcohol from?
Oh. Some homeless guy we picked up from I-70. He bought us $400 worth of alcohol in exchange for a shower.
...... wtf.
I honestly don't know what my boundaries are, but shitting on me is crossing them.
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
My gynaecologist hit my g-spot today by accident and for some reason I went "at least someone found it" VERY AWKWARD
We are so drunk half our team had to bowl with a chaperone. We won every game. We drink
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
FUCK. EVERYONE MAKE MY CONTACT NAME DADDY ISSUES
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
I REALLY NEED TO STOP CELEBRATING THAT FUCKING HOLIDAY
She did what?
Who. The correct term is she did who.
Did you see him? The correct term is definitely what.
I just upped my southern womanhood. Taking whiskey and Kleenex pocket packs to the funeral.
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