he quoted Bring It On. It's over.
if socks could get pregnant i would have catholic amounts of kids
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
You handed some guy a spoon you found, he yelled SPOON GAME, and then the two of you spent the next 20 minutes throwing spoons all over the kitchen.
He just walked into my room in a robe with a cooking pot of cereal.
Well duh, alcohol and getting fucked up are the world's common languages.
My chest hair is, as we speak, arching upward to embrace my neck beard. The union will be a storied one.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
Fuck yeah GAYNESS
*explodes into glitter*
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
We discussed how many times we've passed out during sex. The answers may shock you.
I jus want to remember tomorrow how proud I was tonight for wearing my rainbow leggings as a long sleeved shrug I feel like fucking MacGuyver
I just want to be like "i dont know you but ive seen your penis & i like it"
I feel like you're encouraging me to commit a felony.
I feel like you're wasting time.
Randomize
