He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
Not too sure about the toy story pull ups. The kids point to their crotch all day and say woody.
last time I sleep in the lobby. woke up to some girl asking me what floor I lived on. somebody put me, couch included, on the elevator.
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
He measures volume by how much weed he can put in it and surface area by how many people can have sex in it.
No sexy Asian girl. No comfy bed. I'm just gonna lie here in the hall next to the garbage can until someone comes home.
I mean looking back on it, it's unlucky but at least now we can say we were in jail from 2011 to 2012
That's thinking positively..
I had to make out with him. He bought me a few drinks and he was an Angels fan. As a Yankee fan that was my way of saying good game and sorry we beat the shit out of you
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I'm 2 seconds away from smashing the bottle and drinking it off the counter with a straw.
He was awesome with her today. I can't say that it didn't make my Fallopian tubes sing "The Hills Are Alive."
All I want to do is lay in my bed and eat hotdogs
Just went to jump into bed... Completely missed the bed.
I'm really busy with my period
Randomize
