i have no concept of time, i feel my nose, and im seeing everything in bitty hexagons.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
"must pass the hog line" should not only be used in curling. but also when we go out to pick up girls.
Thank you as well. My penis is starting a slow-clap right now.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
You're the only person I know who would be upset about making out with a girl you like. You're like a drunken Charlie Brown.
I don't know if I want to live in a world where i can't fuck an exes brother.
I need to hump something and I know u understand.
legit question. can i put a condom down our garbage disposal? my rents are coming over in 20
Nothing. Its like my body doesn't know how to function on a Saturday when its not hungover and/or still drunk.
I'm sitting at dinner with my family looking over sexts. The thirst is far too real. They're talking about retail and I'm like haha, yes, you are all correct.
It looks like I jerked off a rainbow.
His favorite stripper is going to jail. He's taking it pretty hard
I just do things that aren't classy the classy way.
I skipped the handshake and went right for a dickshake I had him minutes after I saw him.
Randomize
