She told me to "stuff her hole like a build-a-bear". I was so drunk I didn't even think that was weird.
his dick is like his red hair, amazing but useless
Horny girl and non horny girl have different views on life
I don't remember him, but he's saved in my phone as "uh oh zbt"
I haven't shaved in at least a week, he said "obviously neither one of us was prepared for this"
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
Why is the word 'best' written on my chest?!!
We learned a lot about one another. I showed him around the town I grew up in and he informed me that he has had a threesome and killed a cat
You yelled "I gave my neighbor some of my bitch sauce" and then passed out. You now have drinking limits with us.
I'm sorry you caught us fucking in your bathroom. If it makes you feel any better when I tried to put my pants back on I dropped them in the toilet.
My mom just called hysterical. She and her sister found my dead grandma's vibrator.
The apple don't fall far from that tree.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
You're only young once, and once you get old, you either regret all the sex you had, or you regret not having enough.
I have like three friends I don't have sex with, what did you expect
His mom just pulled off a quadruple cockblock. I'm not sure if I'm mad or impressed?
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