He was dressed in cheap leather and smelled like death.
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
i distinctly remember leaping through the apartment to rescue the clam chowder burning in the kitchen
sarah just described his penis as "like bong-girth." I'm gunna go for it.
Her mom walked into the garage as we were smoking a kush blunt with sombreros on.
Whatever, I used my iphone to send an Escalade to pick up a booty call last week. For free. It is futuristic as fuck out here.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
We need to get you laid. Or i fear you might explode like a firework of sexual innuendos and unfulfilled erotic fantasies.
Only three months past my 21st and I'm done. So many life lessons in so little time.
See this is where I mess up.. I get distracted by the option of consistent sex and free beer
i can trust myself, just not when im drunk. and drinking is my favorite pastime
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
Randomize
