just ask for directions from a guy with a penis drawn on his window
She told me she couldnt give me head last night because she was running out of listerine
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
watching my parents drink 4 loko out of usf cups playing pool and rocking out to ACDC...
Can I come live with you?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like after all he sees, the dog needs to get baptized.
You know, be my cock's hype man.
Rolling one last joint on my Psych textbook before trading it in. I might actually cry.
he slapped my stomach and proclaimed it a baby-free zone
A man pulled out his penis last night and when I said I wouldn't touch it, he said, "that's fine it just needs to breathe".
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
am i so blindsided by his great personality that i'm hooking up with an ugly guy?
i thought you knew
I've officially done it all, fucked a girl wearing a twister board. ABC parties are amazing!
Today is all about not throwing up, where the fuck are my keys and does anyone know what happened to that guy in the panda suit my roommate had sex with last night.
This chick had a condom box organized by size with dividers that glowed in the dark.
I want a musical about memes.
Baby Shark came on during sex.
She has BABY SHARK on her sex playlist. Who does that?
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