You make homosexuality sound like a cult.
we were in your room and your mom was singing twinkle twinkle little star in the hallway. so you decided to scream "twinkle? TWINKLE! What Fucking little star?!"
the only thing he could say in english were 'insert coin here' and 'game over'. i love spanish men.
because whats more american than sleeping with a westpoint cadet on the 4th of july?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
He told me the hand job I gave him this morning was "lovely".
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
He said he only likes girls with a sense of humor, after he took his pants off I understood why
As I fucked him you stood outside my door screaming, "I'M NOT JUDGING YOU!" over and over.
I was judging you.
you're avoiding the subject, i want to know how you ended up at the strip club with the dog, fucker
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Not sure if you're still doing the whole "sleeping with only one person" thing but if you're not we should sleep together when I get back in town tonight.
So it's ironically funny that my psychiatrist's office and my cocaine dealer's house are on the same street
Idk I'm sorry it's weird to ask for testimonials on your penis
Nothing says "single girl" quite like Pinot Grigio and canned ravioli at 11:30 pm....
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
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