I will never underestimate my ability to drunken ramble. At one point last night i think i was talking about hieroglyphics
You kept excitedly announcing to the bar what time it was. Followed by an equally excited "Clock language still makes sense!"
i got iced as i was inside of her. i fucking hate my friends
I'm partying with my neighbors right now, and by "with my neighbors" I mean they are partying in their backyard and I'm partying in mine, and by "partying" I mean I'm sitting here alone drinking tequila.
Somehow "stranger danger" turned into making out with a 25 year old on burbon street.
i just peed with my friends in your backyard... do you still live here
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Yeah, it kinda sucks. But it was fun while it lasted. And honestly, his penis is way too big for my life.
Like it was the Mama Mia of shit shows. That bad.
Pizza toast. It's like pizza but on toast. BC we are broke. OMG its so good.
You would never do this sober.
How many people slept in the bouncy castle last night?
4 guys, 1 girl. Pretty sure were gonna have to pay the cleaning fee
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
I'm sure there's been a weekend in 2014 we were sober... Clearly it wasn't fun, bc I can't recall it. Point proven, alcohol is key.
Oh Jesus our whore days are numbered
I just discovered that jello shots are the best hangover cure
You said that last night when you did jello shots at 4am
Randomize
