I want leopard sheets
haha sexcapades
thats the plan
I always see him when I'm wearing my ripped pants. I think its because of the hole in the crotch. My vag sends out supersonic "I'm horny" waves to him. Otherwise the calls are muffled.
I found my old addy guy via fb who clearly understands the supply and demand curve of addy during finals so he's gonna hook me up.
Best idea ever: Giving hobos a beer and having a chugging contest to win another beer. Most fun I have had downtown in a while.
Only catch is you have to sleep in the same bed as me. But no worries, I plan on being in a random guys hotel room every night. So it's essentially yours.
people in the room actually applauded when we discovered you had the ability to somehow throw up on your own back
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
We played Rock Paper Scissors to see who would have to go down on the other person.
No no this isn't that fun. I'm alone drinking wine and me and the dogs ran out of things to talk about around 9 am.
Nothing like sunday church bells to aid your walk to the pharmacy to get plan b
I may have broke the toilet masturbating. On a positive note the floor is really clean now.
I haven't gotten dressed in 4 days. God bless you, unemployment.
Dude my cat is eating sugar cookies with me. No joke. My cat likes cookies.
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