The pride tent is doing free lube tastings. There is also a mechanical bull.
After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
So if a 2 is a 10 on the road... do we consider college to be "on the road?" help. its urgent.
Good news, I found your other leg warmer. Bad news, I don't know if the pile of puke I found it in was yours.
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
No it's only my right leg that feels like it's about to fall off. The left is fine.
I'm staying at his house to solve the homeless situation. There's a freezer bag of weed in the fridge. He doesn't know it's there, and he's not missing it so I may have an income soon.
I can't wait to see you again...not a euphemism, just really looking forward to seeing you. Wanting to fuck you as often as possible just seems implied at this point.
Your loyalty to the Redskins reminds me how no matter how much I disappoint you, you will still always be rooting for me.
I don't think he likes that I'm always sending him pictures of me in my bra but he needs to get it together
immediately after sex he started talking to me about nerdy stuff he meant to text me earlier, I'm completely smitten
By the way I can not feel my vagina. It's like it's asleep. What the hell did you do?
Just got done being naked and Mooning the cops. I'm still alive. Let's drink.
omg girl... i cut your hair last night. tell me it looks okay!? i saw hair on the counter and i said ohhh nooo
Ummm so he didn't think I was serious about breaking up... Most awkward conversation ever
Randomize
