i wish you could fill a pinata with booze
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
We didn't have beer, so we played mini-beer pong with shots and frozen peas.
You ever just wake up and decide, today I'm going to eat a whole bag of fritos and a tub of cream cheese
The gas station was closed so we found old PBR and played Edward Nalgene Hands instead
My 12 o'clock class is an all star team of my ex's hook ups
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
I fucked some frat guy. Then I found my brother after and made him take his shirt off and then I made him tell me he loves me
Dude you're fine. You're 5 minutes away from your house and you're eating fig newtons
I know, dude. If he ends up having a tiny dick, I will literally pack it back into his pants and leave. Not worth the aggravation.
We need a rematch, I think my pussy was on vacation the other night.
I don't get a "my roommate is fucking you" discount?!
He was tied up with the electrical tape and force fed wine from a box. It was never going to end well.
Its really hard to take a shit when the dog wont stop trying to crawl into your lap
Randomize
