If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Not only is chick snoring like a 48 year old man but she's farting in rhythm
Y do pigs give u trufles on farmville? I WANT BACON YOU FUCKING PIG!
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
i'm transferring to degrassi. i don't care that it's severely canadian. classes are five minutes long, there's no actual work and you can get oot of class whenever you want to go have a dramatic scene with someone in the hall
No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
She's currently celebrating her completion of "Sober October" with "Margarita Shit-Show November."
how was it?
he was petting the bushes because they were "napkins"
Well his arms broken so they only cuffed his good wrist to his belt. That's how he cast smacked me in custody.
So hungover. Have a black eye from where I tried to brush my teeth and stabbed myself in the eye instead. Should make the performance review I was stress drinking about go so much better.
Typing up notes at the bar and doing shots with the bartender until close on a Wednesday. This is what my second year of law school has become.
You get 5 min
Your time limits don't scare me, I'll include foreplay and redressing in that 5 min. If you wanted to challenge me you should say you got an hour, id be scared then and more creative.
I just wanna suck his dick on my balcony ya know
I'm too high and old for this...