I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
Cumbucket.....OH MY GOD THAT COMES UP AUTOMATICALLY NOW!!
he clicked a button a stirrups came down from the ceiling... if I don't come home by sunday, report me.
she had a pic of herself in a bikini as the wallpaper on her iPhone... I'm sensing a Tyra banks kinda girl. shit.
dude we were making out and she kept singing the americas next top model song. you wanna be on top?
I went to the bathroom like 8 times and each time I looked in the mirror and tried saying "I am sober." I burst out laughing when I got to "so-" every time. If you can't convince yourself, you can't convince anyone else. Fuck it, I'm going upstairs and drinking more.
You make your fellow Jews happy.
i'm not sure when it happened but apparently now it's topless bar night, im wearing a leotard and everyone is looking at me like i'm cheating.
The plan is to make enough mistakes this weekend to hold me over until spring break
I just got a reminder alert on my phone for an event I titled "Bradley getting stupid high with me in bed." I assume we planned this during the party. I'm down if you are.
Don't get me wrong, the sex itself is amazing, but I don't think I will EVER get used to her habit of singing lines Jesus christ super star when she is about to cum.
as i sobered up i realized that her cute accent was actually a speech impediment
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
How have I seen you throw up on yourself 3 different times, yet we weren't Facebook friends until I accidentally hooked up with your ex?
You walked into the frat house and screamed "whose down to fuck" i think they were more intimidated than anything
I wasn’t trying, but work got a lot easier and more fun once he starred flirting with me and looking at my ass
Randomize
