Is he smart?
Why would i know that. That would deal with the top half of his body. I only deal with the bottom half.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Dance move was taxi-ing on the runway then taking off in a plane. All the boys wanted to beat you up cause they were like "who is this angel flapping her arms like a bird in the bar i must have her"
My mom just told me my dad shaves his pubes while drunk and I don't know how to feel anymore.
In my dream, you became a famous tap-dancer. Congratulations.
its one thing to be single and another thing to be single and then have your profile picture be of you and the cat
your picture is with misty too!!
I AM SINGLE BY CHOICE
OMG BTW REMEMBER HOW HE ORDERED PIZZA THAT ONE TIME WE HOOKED UP. APPARENTLY HE WAS HANDING IT OUT TO PEOPLE WHO LIVE IN MY BUILDING AS HE WAS LEAVING
You want to groom your chest hair? You mean with a little baby chest hair brush? Because that sounds adorable.
We got hammered last night and I woke up this morning with texts from 'iron maiden chick.' wtf?
I also told the pizza delivery guy that he smelled good. I must be ovulating.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
You were out of control then you fell asleep on his lap for 30 min and woke up civil. Way to powernap to sobriety!
Swear to god, somebody just drove by with mickey mouse in their passenger seat and he waved at me.
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
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