Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
No jewlry, no bra, and no pen. I couldnt be more prepared for a friday morning class.
Avril Lavigne as a judge on Idol wearing devil ears. it's like every boner you ever had in 2002 just came true.
You came in at two thirty, wearing your underwear and a tie then asked where you could find a sombrero and a pair of stilletos that would fit your men's size thirteen feet.
Did Kevin really put his bar tab under the name Hercules last night?
Somewhere during foreplay he said something about me only being with two other guys... I just went with it cause we have never had that conversation...
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
Careful, it's a slippery slope to discovering you're bisexual...trust me.
Why is it that every study session with you turns into a hunt for drugs?
I threw up in a pringles can. how do you think my night went.
Imagine the quality of nudes you could send with a selfie stick
I just had drunken sex with an eagle scout behind the boy scouts of america building. what has my life come to?!
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Flirting with/getting ready to possibly sleep with a married HS classmate and getting added to a bible study group chat within minutes of each other. #Balance
Randomize
