Did you hit it?
Turns out she was a he. but to answer your question, yes.
I realize now. I should have just made out with everyone and anyone when I had the chance.
so I just used the H1N1 mask my mom gave me for college to hold in a bong hit longer... god I love orientation week
so this guy on craigslist is offering a case of beer to shave his back. i think i'm gonna take him up on it.
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
If you were curious as to how many pounds of bagged marijuana can fit in the trunk of a 2010 Chevrolet Aveo, we now have the answer
We blazed in her bathtub. All 5 of us. Not easy bro
Will you push me around in a wheel chair, introduce me to people, and say nothing as I get up and walk away?
Hahaha I can already see the arrest warrants. It's gonna be beautiful. I'll get them framed.
I kept on yelling at him to get his shit together as he was puking
All I remember is allowing my uber driver to pull over on the side of the road to give me a massage. I was alone
Woke up this morning with girl, I ask her for some gum. She says "there's a guest toothbrush for the boys in my bathroom". I can't decide whats worse, that she has a shack brush or that I actually used it
That awkward moment when you hear your boss yelling during sex while you're on her couch eating Easy Mac.
Heading there now. Already have a boner.
reminiscing on last night: why the fuck did I feel the need to stand on chairs everytime we took a jello shot?
Randomize
