She's good at three things and two of them involve dicks. And other one involves her love for arts
she's using motion activated glade air fresheners as some sort of early warning system
were lost, were cold and we don't know what to do with the stray cat we found.
You're going to the beach with me so we can have beach sex whether you like it or not. Get over it. Kthx.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
They're letting me teach a freshman-laden class now. This university needs better background checks.
I think you are the only one slutty enough and evil enough for the job. Just go in and blue ball him. He broke my nose in Middle school. He deserves this.
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
The friend zone. He put me in the friend zone. But said he still wants me to suck his dick. I'm in the dick sucking friend zone and I want to die.
My goal in life is to ruin sex for someone. To be so mindblowingly unreal that they can never find anyone like me ever again. So far it's going well.
Her weave came out on the dance floor. She was twerking and shaking one minute and her hair flew across the dance floor the next. Great way to be introduced to the family
I supernannyed him into submission
i woke up in just my thong, face first on my bed with all the lights on. how hungover do you think i felt?
Don't get mad at me now, you have my car and all the doughnuts
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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