I just walked by a homeless man reading the money section of USA Today...
Is it too weird if im a sexy tampon for halloween?
This hangover is way worse than all my relationships
he was wearing a tuxedo, i was naked...it's a long story.
Wanna hang out, and by hang out I mean go get plan B... and maybe lunch, but mostly plan b
if by "adventure" you actually mean "getting ridiculously high and shaving our legs," then yes.
Normally I would go for him, but there's just way too much vodka under the bridge for that
Kurt said to text you and encourage you to come out tonight. Encourage you with my rack.
She's wearing her dead grandmother's pearl on the married finger so no guys "bother her" tonight... I am not THAT committed to Girl's Night.
Ohmygod. I don't know if I can explain how great it'll be. I hope you don't mind Subaru sex
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
I mean metaphorically speaking, maybe we've all fucked on top of a frat house at some point in our lives
I don't think "growing medical marijuana" is Quite what my Grandfather had in mind when he thought me about gardening as a child
I need to align my fucking chakras
I showered three hours ago and yet feel the need for another one already. This is my day.
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